I'm passionate about writing and encouraging people. I want the whole world to know about the Father-heart of God and His unstoppable love for those who believe in His Son, Jesus.
God has promised not to give us more than we can bear
This goes for both crisis and blessings. The truth is that God will not allow either crisis or blessings to destroy us. We forget that God intimately knows our limits, and he works within the unseen and unknowable boundaries of our individual lives.
Many of us break apart too soon, and so miss what God is doing through the crisis, or we cap off his blessings too early because of false humility.
You see, we miss out on transformation and glorification because we doubt God’s heart. We give too much power to the Devil, and so, diminish the greatness of God and his working in our lives.
We need to adjust our trust!
Our trust must be unconditional in God, or our trust in him will fail on the day of uncertainty and crisis.
The Prophet Isaiah puts it this way: I form the light and create darkness, I bring prosperity and create disaster; I, the LORD, do all these things. –Isaiah 45:7
Job discusses this dilemma with his wife…
… His wife said to him, “Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!”
Job replies, “You are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God and not evil?” In all this, Job did not sin in what he said. –Job 2:9-10
You see, we need to adjust our trust as to the unchangeable nature of who God is and not to how our circumstances make us feel. God is in control of absolutely everything, and He wants us to be masters over evil, rather than evil mastering over us.
God explains to Cain:
“What’s with this tirade and sulking? You will be accepted if you do what is right. But if you refuse to do what is right, then watch out! Sin is crouching at the door, eager to control you. But you must subdue it and be its master.” –Gen. 4:7
Our feelings are uncertain and always changing, but God is a sure foundation. He’s not controlled by emotions. We need to unconditionally trust God’s heart. Not at all easy, but real and authentic trust requires genuine faith.
If you consistently adjust your trust to what you feel, you end up inviting the Devil to be the interpreter of your crisis. He would have you curse God and die rather than die to your false imaginations and feelings and live. The Devil is a trickster and a hustler of all sorts of feelings.
An unwavering trusting child of God, no matter the circumstances, is a destroyer of evil and an unquenchable light in the most darkest night!
Shine brightly, my dear brothers and sisters!
For a child is born to us, a son is given to us. The government will rest on his shoulders. And he will be called: Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. –Isaiah 9:6
By the way, the above verse is now all in present tense!
Adjust Your Trust in the Unchangeable and Everlasting Father. He is The Wonderful Counselor, God of the Angel Armies, and The Prince of Peace!
Adjust your trust in God – it’s all on His shoulders and not yours…
… And your life will become radiant as you triumph through difficulties. All because God knows what he’s doing, and you belong to him. After all, you are His responsibility!
“You’ve kept track of my every toss and turn, through the sleepless nights, each tear entered in your ledger, each ache is written in your book.” –Psalms 56:8
“He has not forgotten the one who is hurting. He has not turned away from his suffering. He has not turned his face away from him. He has listened to his cry for help.” –Psalms 22:24
Our family consisted of eight people, and we lived in our tiny 1400-square-foot, four-bedroom, two-bath home in a housing development in Martinez, CA. I lived there from late 1965 until July 1978.
During those years, I was forced to share a bedroom with my older brother Jeffrey, who is only sixteen months older than me. I had always thought it was a mistake for our parents to room Jeffery and me together, as we constantly fought and were at each other’s throats!
But at the same time, we were both there for each other, especially after we both were terribly beaten, sometimes separately, and at times together, we were lashed, punched, or kicked. During Those moments, Jeffrey and I would become friends and assuage each other’s wounds or share our complaints and anger about what had happened and the unfairness of it all. And maybe our brief times of fellowship and friendship were based on the principle: “The enemy of my enemy is my friend.” Still, Jeffrey helped me as my older brother by caring for me when I was abused.
At times, we’d become fellow cellmates, imprisoned in our bedroom together for hours or perhaps for an entire day. However, I think Jeffrey had it much worse than me, if you can believe it!
At ten years of age, my life began to exhibit evidence of being soul murdered. Although physically alive, my trust and sense of safety were nearly gone. I was incapable of bonding and receiving love or belonging to anyone. The hole this created in me was too broad and deep for any human to fill. I was unwanted and unloved. The abuse was so horrific that it impacted my identity.
During those abusive years, I developed new titles: The Discarded One, The Disgraceful One, and the Unwanted One, which began to dictate my life and identity. My mother bestowed those titles upon me during her fits of rage.
I became a lost boy, un-fathered and un-mothered by nurture and love. My home was my house of horrors. I found solace in living a secret life of fantasy and daydreaming, similar to the 1947 movie with Danny Kaye called: “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty.”
In elementary school, I would sit there, daydreaming of some incredible feat or be far away on a voyage to uncharted islands of mystery. I always imagined myself as the hero.
After my father had passed away, I found a bundle of old report cards. One report card from my second-grade teacher, Mrs. Dodd, stood out. On the back of the report card was written a personal note to my parents:
“Thomas just seems to sit here in class, daydreaming.”
Growing up, you were always guilty in our home and never allowed the opportunity to plead your innocence. Even if one of my siblings tattled on me, it would often end up with a beating or punishment. The only thing protecting each of us from excessive tattling was the military doctrine of “Mutual Assured Beatings!” Even the tattler could be swept up in our mother’s rage, suffering a beating, too! So, we used tattling sparingly.
This created a hypersensitivity to injustice, yet I felt powerless to do anything about it. Even today, I am acutely sensitive to injustice against myself and others.
“Fate, it seems, is not without its sense of irony,” said Morpheus in the movie, “The Matrix.” . Like Neo, the movie’s central character, he was powerless and a slave to a programmed existence. My “sense of irony” showed up in my career choices. I believe my sensitivity to injustice is why I have successfully settled claims on behalf of fire and water damage victims. I am empathetic to individuals and families being abused by Impersonal insurance companies that place shareholders above policyholders.
So, unknown to me, the terrible injustice I suffered as a child had fatefully trained me for my vocation. Perhaps it is more likely that the sense of irony is not fate, but rather, I became attracted to my career choices because of parental abuse and their unjust treatment.
Had there been an actual “Morpheus” in my life, it would have been so helpful to extricate me from the matrix of horrors. But, in fact, there was. This is why my hopeless story is so hope-filled. The name “Morpheus” actually means: ‘He who shapes.’ As you read on, you will learn through my story that there has indeed been, and continues to be, a “Morpheus” in my life.
Nevertheless, an undeniable force is shaping me through a maze of pain and struggle of good and bad days to a present joy-filled life, which now I would never trade or abandon. It would be like saying to a diamond, “Turn back into coal,” or to a pearl, “Turn back into a grain of sand.” I’m still in the “rough,” so to speak, and in between two extremes: the lightness of joy and contentment and the weightiness of pain and agony.
This precise pressure point masterfully creates diamonds of joy and the pearls of contentment within my life. Pain is never the product of this process, but joy and happiness are. Pain and agony are elements necessary to produce “suffering,” which produces eternal qualities and degrees of character that can not be developed in any other way.
So, in a nutshell, “Don’t waste your suffering!” It is the process of suffering that can lead to a fulfilling life! And so it is, I believe, for you, too. Your story is not an endless season of reruns but of purposeful and significant meaning.
“Rest, the answers are coming…” Said Morpheus to a perplexed and doubting Thomas Anderson at the beginning of his transformation into “Neo.”
By the way, you are transforming, and what that is will be revealed in time. The process you are in may be painful and even hopeless, but everything good and true, of worth and value, comes with pain and suffering. It is all a part of living and transforming. Until then, my dear friend, “Rest, the answers are coming…”
Be brave enough to journey into your past. Not alone like you have so many times before; no, this time, journey back with God. Invite Him into your past as your guide, comforter, and healer. Ask Him for wisdom and understanding. Then, prepare yourself to forgive those who’ve wounded and harmed you. Forgiveness is pivotal. Without it, you’ll remain imprisoned and tormented.
This was the journey that I took and am still on. This is how I learned the importance of forgiveness and the value of tears. Tears are the beginning of transforming from The Unseen One to God’s Beloved One.
“Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again, he can not see the kingdom of God.” –Jesus of Nazareth, John 3:3
Religion, unfortunately, can be filled with do’s and don’ts; traditionalism, legalism, hierarchy, and elitism are its hallmarks. I’m sure many of you have had good and bad experiences with religion.
My story isn’t about religion, however. It’s about new life, freedom, and forgiveness. I have gained hope and a future that can’t be found in any of the world’s religions or cults. It’s about an intimate connection and communication with the living and real presence of an incredibly loving God!
I wasn’t seeking God, nor did I strain to appease his wrath or try to win his favor. God pursued me. He revealed himself to me in such an amazing way! Even though His Word and Holy Spirit convicted me, God didn’t leave me in my guilt and shame.
You can’t turn away from your sins. That would make you your savior. Without a Savior, you’re left in an endless cycle of rinse and repeat. The active ingredient is true repentance, which comes only from God.
You see, this is the difference between true salvation and religion. Religion leaves you in your guilt and shame, but true salvation removes the stain of sin, guilt, and shame. Religion offers bondage, but God’s salvation, through Jesus Christ, brings forgiveness, a clear and clean conscious, and amazing freedom!
Okay, on to the story of my second birth…
I was ten years old and in Sunday morning service in Martinez, California, at Bethany Baptist Church, “The End Of Your Search For A Friendly Church,” their sign read.
Like so many Sundays before December 20, 1970, I heard the offer of Salvation at the end of each service. Only this time, as we sang a hymn, “Just One Plea,” which convicted my troubled ten-year-old heart.
Nonetheless, I sat there frozen, wanting to stand up but was too afraid. Sitting at a distance, to my right, was my Sunday School teacher, John C. Morgan. At that time, he was 84 and a Christian for 64 years. I loved that man as though he was my grandfather.
As the song continued, I struggled to sing the following words:
“Just as I am, without one plea But that Thy blood was shed for me And that Thou bid’st me come to thee O Lamb of God, I come, I come…”
I looked towards John Morgan, and at his old leathered face; he gently smiled and motioned with his head in the direction of the center aisle. His gentle smile and motion gave me enough courage to stand up and walk my green mile to the altar, where I did business with the Son of God, Jesus Christ. Whereby I confessed and repented from the sins of a lost and guilt-ridden, ten-year-old little boy. Can a ten-year-old boy be guilty of sin? Do birds fly? Any honest parent or sibling knows the answer!
I placed my faith and belief in all that Jesus accomplished here and in heaven. I wept every step of that short journey to the altar but found indescribable joy at the moment of God’s salvation.
I am so saddened that many churches no longer do alter calls, or they do them, but only with every head bowed and every eye closed. No, my dear brothers and sisters, let salvation be seen! Allow God’s lost sons and daughters their time of triumphant entry into God’s amazing grace, mercy, and love!
Praise God for his indescribable love to those who believe and obey his good news! Seek God through Jesus his Son, here, now, while he can be found. Confess your sins, turn from them, and believe in the Son of God!
This December 20, 2024, will be my second birth celebration of 55 years as a Christ-follower.
I am a child of the Most-High God, all because Jesus Christ, His Son, took upon himself all of the wrath of God in my place.
God is the secret behind my 44-year marriage. He guided me as a faithful father. He made me into a man of peace. He softened my heart. He healed my broken and abused heart. He forgave me all of my sins. And, very importantly, he calls me son and allows me to call him Abba-Father! “Abba,” means daddy or poppa.
“Because you are his sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, “Abba, Father.”’ –Galatians 4:6
Don’t fall for burdensome religion; fall in love with God. He first loved you–loved you enough that His Son, Jesus Christ, took God’s wrath upon himself, so you, too, can become His son or daughter! Amen
During the early morning hours of October 11, 2013, I checked myself into the hospital for heart attack symptoms. The test results were negative for a heart attack but positive for stress.
On November 13, 2013, I tripped down the stairs, overloaded with my stuffed laptop case on my left shoulder and my overnight bag on the right, heading out of town. My first stop was Groveland, CA, where I was to meet with a few good men to evaluate a retreat center for Wounded Warriors. Then, I was to travel to the Bay Area to cram in a few field assignments.
While overloaded with baggage and in a rush, I tripped, descending the stairs. I tore my quadriceps in three places! All my body weight of 240 lbs. plus 40 lbs. of luggage was transferred to my left leg in a fraction of a second, which caused me to overshoot two steps.
Suddenly, a loud “SNAP” and instant pain shot from above my knee, crumbling my leg beneath me and launching me forward like Superman! Flying without a cape, with legs kicked out and arms stretched forward, I belly-flopped on the hardwood entry floor from the midpoint, landing unfortunately without superpowers!
While In flight, I yelled:
“NO! No … no, not again…”
I landed my face softly on my laptop case, which was catapulted ahead of me, but the rest of my body hit the floor with a mighty thump!
I lay there clutching my laptop case, writhing in pain, tears rolling down my chin when I thought of another visit to the hospital! We lost our health insurance on July 31, 2013, because our premiums were higher than our house payment!
“The Lord will make you go through hard times. He will be there to teach you, and you will not have to search for him anymore. If you wander off the road to the right or the left, you will hear his voice behind you, saying, “Here is the road. Follow it.” – Isaiah 30:20-21
There are many things that I believe God is teaching me through these injuries and the stress I have been under. God was teaching me dependence; dependence on Him and others in my life. I tend to be too independent and self-reliant, overworked, and overloaded.
I need to take a break from the busy “Martha Neurosis” and pursue the “Mary Calmness” at the feet of Jesus.
I need to live more in the reality of Jesus’ presence and truly rest in that all Government is on his shoulders, not mine, nor the Republicans, Democrats, Independents; not the Libertarians, the Greenies, Commies, Socialists, or MAGA.
I need to relish and relax in His governance and be swept up in its epic and eternal expansion.
It’s not a matter of whether God is on my side or their side; the truth is, God is on neither the Right nor the Left’s side; God is on His side. And I must join His cause and let the “talking heads” of the alphabet networks talk to themselves.
“For who has known the mind of the Lord? or who has been his counselor?” – Romans 11:34
“But who can teach a lesson to God since he judges even the most powerful?” – Job 21:22
I need to prioritize His ever-expanding rule of His present Kingdom and tap into its economy instead of creating my own or following the world’s economic priorities, which always leads to emptiness, exhaustion, and death. His Kingdom must expand its rule within and beyond us.
His eternal Kingdom’s expansion within us will inoculate us against the ever-increasing pressure of this world. If we all were to become Kingdom-minded and submit and yield to the Lordship of Christ, we would move from being overcome to being an over-comer!
I need to seek out his Wonderful Counsel hourly, benefit from His omniscience (his all-knowing) of me, and listen to his whispers before they become a painful megaphone. God will never cancel my therapy sessions but will forever counsel me. All I must do is show up, as there is no deductible, co-pay, or cost! Oh, and no appointments are necessary. Just pray right in!
I must relinquish my puny strength and small-mindedness and humbly stand beneath and behind God’s Mightiness and title, “The God of the Angel Armies!”
I need to exchange my war-weariness and shell-shocked life and take comfort and confidence in God’s authority, who’s never lost a battle and ultimately will win the war. He loves a stacked deck because he loves to come through for all those who belong to him and have the patience to wait on him.
I need to surrender the un-fathered and incomplete areas of my heart, mind, and soul to the Everlasting Father-heart of God. I must accept the challenge, correction, and discipline, even loss and pain, as initiation (teaching) and fathering from God. I need to agree with the legitimacy of my identity as God’s beloved son and not the conspiratorial voices of darkness that impose on me the false title of “Victim.”
“Endure your suffering as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is there that a father does not discipline?” – Hebrews 12:7
I need to allow the Prince of Peace to usher His reign of peace, calm, and good tidings of great joy into the depths of my being until my heart rejoices no matter what state I may find myself in. I need to celebrate His Peace, even in the presence of my enemies, whereby I can feast without intimidation or fear. I need to relax when I open my winter’s electric bill and read it in peace, knowing confidently He reigns even over things such as these.
I need to focus on the quiet streams while driving the busy streets of life and drink God’s thirst-quenching flow rather than virus-infected cesspools of worldly wants and desires, leaving one spiritually dehydrated and drained of life.
I need to completely trust in God’s judgment and enrich my life, every bit of it, with His justice so that all my actions are just and fair, not only to myself, so that I may live healthy and whole, but that the fruits of my life may encourage health and wholeness to others. I need to: “… do justly, to love mercy, and walk humbly with my God.” – Micah 6:8.
I need to be a man who taps into the counsel of The Wonderful Counselor, whereby He faithfully counsels me with wisdom and insight. His counsel protects me from the lies and seductions of the world and the inner voices of self-destruction.
I need an Everlasting, Never Leaving, Never Busy, Always there Father-God, who loves me and you so much that He puts his Spirit in us to teach us His most favorite Name: Abba, Poppa, or Daddy!
I want peace in my life, marriage, home, church, business, and everywhere.
Don’t you?
And, this Jesus, whose name is maligned, marginalized, cursed, and removed from our telecasts, prayers, and our speeches, from our schools, courtrooms, and public places, came to us as a babe, a child in a manger that became Jesus our Savior!
He is the Prince of Peace, and “… the increase of his government and peace there shall be no end, upon the throne of David, and his kingdom, to order it, and to establish it with righteous judgment, with justice from henceforth even forever. The zeal of the LORD of hosts will perform this.” – Isaiah 9:6-7
And The Zeal of the Lord already accomplished this 2000 years ago!
With so much authority, honor, and titles given to Jesus, don’t you think He can save you? He is your connection to the Father-Hearted God of Heaven.
It’s far better to listen to His whispers than through His megaphone!
A life where there’s no believin’ is a life where there’s no livin’.
Have you noticed lately that the things worth believin in are quickly disappearing?
Sadly, many marriages and romances are vanishing. I’m not talking about Hollywood’s shallow relationships but marriages of our friends and family members. I think marriages fail because people, once in love, stopped believin in the important things.
It’s not about the type of groom we were during the wedding. That’s the easy part. That day was fanciful, romantic, and ceremonial. It’s the kind of man that we’ve become in the crucible of marriage, and while the ceremony has long since faded, romance and passion are still alive and well. That’s the sign of a good marriage and of a good man. We need more good men and healthy marriages these days.
A good man brings out the best in his woman. Likewise, a good woman does the same for her man. A marriage becomes ugly when we forget those things.
I love the movie “Secondhand Lions,” starring Robert Duvall. It’s a movie rich with quotable dialog.
“… True love never dies. Doesn’t matter if it’s true or not. A man should believe in those things, because those are the things worth believin in.”
True love never dies. It’s certainly true of our faith, isn’t it? Christ’s love for his Bride will never die, neither his love for you, if you believe in those things, and in Him, because, “those things are worth believin in.”
As a matter of fact, it’s Christ in us, which makes us into a good man and a good woman. And, the trinity of Jesus, a man, and a woman together as one creates an unbeatable marriage.
The reason why so many good marriages fail is when one or both walk away from Jesus as the center of their individual lives and the center of their marriage. The reason why the world hates marriage is because it is the physical manifestation of the Holy Trinity. It is a Living example of Christ loving the Church and giving up His life for her, His Bride.
“I’m Hub McCann. I’ve fought in two World Wars and countless smaller ones on three continents. I led thousands of men into battle with everything from horses and swords to artillery and tanks. I’ve seen the headwaters of the Nile, and tribes of natives no white man had ever seen before. I’ve won and lost a dozen fortunes, KILLED MANY MEN and loved only one woman with a passion a FLEA like you could never begin to understand. That’s who I am!” The movie, “Second Hand Lions”
Who are you?
What kind of Man are you?
What kind of woman are you?
When you have no firm identity, you have only weakness against the things out to destroy your love for your wife or husband. You have very little strength to fight the enemy of your relationship with God.
So goes your relationship with God, so goes everything else!
A good and lasting marriage vitally depends on your relationship to God through Jesus Christ. Remember? It’s the three-fold cord of Christ Jesus, a man, and a woman. That’s your superpower against the enemy of your marriage.
Don’t settle for the passion of a flea. Have the passion of a ferocious lover, willing to surrender and sacrifice your life for the one you love and for God, the Lover of your soul.
I know that so many of you, even my close friends, have given up on their marriages and God. You’ve walked away searching for meaning, significance, and identity. You’ll not find it in another lover if you never had it with the one you left.
You’ll only find meaning, significance, and identity in God. Not in sex, romance, and one-nighters. Turn back to Him, and turn back to your First Love.
“These are the things worth believin in.”
So, don’t be a flea brain! Believe in the things worth believin in.
Over the past three decades, I have been curious to learn about the wounds I’ve suffered during my youth and formative years.
It’s not what will happen to you that will change your life, I spoke out one night of lecturing, but rather, what happened long ago has already changed your life.
The words we speak or shout at our children forever become their inner voice. It changes a child’s psyche, distorting their inner soul and eating away their future. Harsh words from mom and dad have tremendous prophetic meaning to a child.
The words we speak or shout at our children forever become their inner voice.
And because of those words, you’ve been living a different trajectory. You’re living out a life that you were not meant to live. You’re living a cursed life.
While young and innocent, most of us knowingly or perhaps unknowingly have made life-changing vows or agreements while amid abuse, whether emotional, psychological, or physical. While eliciting powerful emotions of hate, anger, bitterness, or rage, these past hurts or wounds can conjure dark agreements with the Father of Lies.
John 8:44 says that all lies come from the Father of Lies, who is the Devil.
The devil’s strategy is to get us to make these dark vows and live from them. He uses the most important people in our lives to originate these lies. Some of these lies are:
You’re no good. You’re unloveable. You’re too ugly. You’re too fat. You’re too skinny. You’re too stupid. You’re a loser. No one will ever want you. You’ll always be a failure, etc.
And one that I heard all my life growing up was:
“What’s wrong with you?!?”
The list can be pretty long, and the voices of others soon become our voices, echoing self-deprecating and ugly curses over our hearts and minds—eating away at our future.
Unknowingly, our parents can speak the devil’s curses and lies over us at a time when we were mythical, fanciful, and magical of heart. Because children can believe the unbelievable, curses and lies become part of their identity and belief system. They end up living them out like prophecies written in ancient manuscripts. These “prophecies” direct their lives, careers, and relationships.
To bring healing to these past wounds and nullify the agreements is a path that only a few have taken. Even though freedom and wholeness are possible, many of us prefer to live in the seclusion and cover of darkness and duplicity. We’ve come too far or lived too long with our false persona; the mere thought of dismissing or exposing our poser-selves is too frightening.
So, we pose, playing hide and seek at work, home, and church. The longer we play this nightmarish game, the more hardened and sadistic we become to our wounded hearts and souls.
This process continues until we become addicted to sex, drugs, alcohol, and lies. Or, perhaps our drug of choice is our reputation or religiosity. Maybe we’ve masqueraded for so long that we’re lost even to ourselves!
The stress of chronic fakery is as deadly as a heart attack and a silent killer, just as hypertension and high blood pressure can kill you. Why, we’re simply a walking time bomb of contradictions, lies, and hypocrisies.
Oh, my dear friend, there is such hope, so I am writing to you. Please read on.
Isaiah has said, “Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter.” Isaiah 5:20.
Jesus said, “… And if the light you think you have is darkness, how deep that darkness is!” Matthew 6:23.
I know all about this. This was and is my life. It is both my past and my journey. There is a redeemer and a healer. He is pursuing you, not to judge you, but to redeem, heal, and restore you to who you were meant to be!
Your True Father wants you back. As the late Brennen Manning has so often quoted:
“God accepts you as you are and not as you should be. Because you’re never going to be as you should be.”
The Good News is that it’s God’s responsibility to transform you as you should be.
Transformation is not your wife’s job, boss’s, or best friend’s — it’s not your pastor’s or priest’s job or any self-help guru’s to change you. It is the job of a loving God, who’s waiting for you to call out to him; “Abba,” “Papa,” or “Daddy,” or even “Father-God.”
The only way to the Father is through the Son. And it is the Son, Jesus Christ, who’s taken upon himself all the curses and dark vows ever spoken in any language and tongue against us, so that we may be loved rather than destroyed.
Do you see this? God can make your life awesome, if you allow him to take away all the crap, hurts, wounds, and pain inside of you.
Oh, and it can be taken away! All the guilt, shame, and self-loathing—all the self-hatred and hatred of others can be removed. All the self-doubts and doubting of others, all the lost trust of self and others, and the cynical and diabolic distrust and suspicion can, and will be gone!
Just say this prayer out loud, or even in a whisper:
Dear Jesus Christ, I stand before you, exposed, scared, ashamed, and afraid. I have lived a sinful life and have hurt myself and others. I confess to you my wrongdoings, my mistakes, and my faults. I acknowledge my need for forgiveness from you and my need to forgive others. I also forgive myself for the harm that I’ve done to me. I believe in your Word of Truth and that you lived a sinless life, died on a cross of suffering because you took upon yourself all my sin, all the curses spoken over me, and all my wrongdoings. You were buried in a tomb and were raised to life on the third day, making it possible for me to be forgiven and to have a new life, new hope, and a future. I believe these things in my heart, and I confess and acknowledge them with my mouth to be saved and redeemed. I am now your true son or daughter, and I can now call you my Abba-Father as you have put your Spirit into my transformed and purified heart forever and ever. Thank you for my salvation and healing in the Name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
Now, live a new life and understand that you now belong to God as his child, and you’ve become his responsibility. He is no dead-beat-dad. He is a Mighty God, an Everlasting Father, a Wonderful Counselor, and the Prince of Peace. All authority is upon his shoulders, and His Kingdom shall know no end.
Welcome home to a loving God and an incredible Savior!
The danger is to do nothing. Doing nothing is to remain in darkness and under curses and false agreements. Do something with your new life and truly live! No longer agree with the dark voices in the back of your mind. Instead, reject their curses and evil thoughts in the Name and Authority of Jesus Christ!
Give the Father of Lies an Eviction Notice and cancel all your curses!
Toni and I often talk about life changes, boundaries, and priorities. But family always tops our list.
Watching our children grow up, getting married, and seeing them succeed in their careers is what brings us joy. But what’s much more important is their relationships with each other and their commitment to our family and to the families they’re building.
The older I get, inching closer to the end of life, the irony is that it forces you to live a more meaningful life now, or at least it should. To wait until retirement to prioritize family is a sad mistake that I think too many make.
We do need to die, in some respects, to those things which promote death and live more towards those things which promote life. It’s like choosing between bacon, which I love, but it fosters death, and beansprouts, which I hate but promote life. However, living life on hospital food is certainly no fun either. So, we strive for a balance. And, this is what my brush with death has taught me.
The movie “Click,” with Adam Sandler, has some great truths running through it, along with its great humor and satire.
Morty (The Angel of Death), played by Christopher Walken, tells Michael Newman, played by Adam Sandler, who’s fast-forwarding his way through life with an enchanted TV clicker:
Morty remarks:
“He’s always chasing the pot of gold, but when he gets there, at the end of the day, it’s just cornflakes.”
Towards the end of the movie (WARNING SPOILER ALERT), Michael finally gets it and cries out, in his throes of death:
Michael Newman: [dying] “Family, family… … FAMILY COMES FIRST.”
Isn’t it so true? Family should come first, and I can promise, in the very moment when life is quickly or slowly draining from your body, it’s family that first comes to your mind…
… I want to see our two grandchildren, with Josh and Jenny, grow up.
Oh my goodness, it’s Tessa’s 24th birthday, and I will miss it!
Tears began rolling down my face as I saw those moments of life fast-forwarding before me. That was my wake-up call at 2:30 in the morning, Friday, October 11, 2013, as I sat in triage at the Sonora Adventist Hospital all alone, and when the reality of “heart attack” was suggested by the ER physician.
I wanted to exchange “I love you” with my wife and children again! I wanted to see who’d become my son, Jordan’s wife, and welcome her into our family.
I confess that not one of my projects, clients, or deadlines entered my mind while facing the prospect of a heart attack. Not one more contract signing or one more insurance settlement, which I have to face, is most likely what put me in the hospital in the first place.
As it turned out, it wasn’t a heart attack, but me, attacking my heart because of too many “yeses” and not enough “nos.” My physician told me that too much stress could cause cardiac arrest.
I need to say a serious “YES” to life and a meaningful “NO” to death. It’s the wrong choices in those subtle moments that can soon pile up into a health crisis. It is all those times when the tyranny of less critical things overrules the more essential things of life.
“Let your yes mean yes, and your no mean no; anything more than that is from the Evil One.” Matthew 5:37 – Jesus of Nazareth
I don’t think striving to love your family correctly, keeping your promises, being home on time for dinner, or kissing your wife and kids goodbye in the morning has put anybody into the hospital.
Proverbs 4:23 says it best: “Guard your heart more than anything else because the source of life flows from it.”
It’s the redeemed heart where God lives that is our source of life. This, too, is where our families live and dwell. This is also where the love of our life resides. Work should never enter our hearts the way God and our loved ones do, for it will always push God, family, and our loved ones out! Guard your heart more than anything else! Not your reputation, ego, pride, or being right—but your HEART!
Our misplaced priorities will always attack what truly matters to our hearts and, if ignored, may eventually cause you to attack your heart, like I did.
So, my new motto for life:
“Family, family… … FAMILY COMES FIRST!”
In this, we find all the treasures of life, and it’s those relationships and memories that are worth living and fighting for.
After all, everything else, “at the end of the day, is just cornflakes!”
Doubt is the gravitational force that keeps you from piercing through the atmosphere of the impossible.
Doubt is a killer of dreams and all that gives your life meaning.
Your faith is the rocket fuel that allows you to violate the forces of nature, doubt, and even physics.
Faith destroys doubt despite fear.
Faith in the ability and will of God can only win when you reject all other options. The more primary your faith becomes, the more God can do through your faith.
Are you asking God how? Author John Eldredge has written that “the question how?” is faithless. The question “how” can cause a failure in launching your faith and your ability to break through the gravitational forces of doubt…
… God wants your immediate obedience because this shows how much you trust him for all the unseen details.
When you break the gravitational forces of doubt, angels gather in excited anticipation, and demons become unsettled and defeated.
Now, do what you’ve been called to do. Sometimes, the equipping and provisions are developed during the journey, and this, too, will cause your faith to soar.
What are you waiting for?
You already have permission from God’s Word to do the impossible. When you step out to do the impossible, God shows himself in each impossible step. His miracles become the breadcrumbs for others to follow and a testimonial to your faith and to God’s faithfulness.
Doubt is a killer of trust and belief. Doubt keeps your relationships shallow and creates distance between you, God, and eternity.
You will never enjoy life to the fullest or know the depth of God until your trust becomes bigger than your doubt.
Break through the gravitational force of doubt. Until you do, you’ll never know your true purpose in life—You’ll never see the impossible happen.
When Toni and I were called to do the impossible, the doubters came out of the woodwork! Not because they were afraid for us but because they were afraid of us. Doubters love doubters, but those who break free from the gravitational force of doubt are a threat to their excuses.
Many years ago, August 4, 1984, to be exact; God called Toni and I to Youth With A Mission (YWAM). We needed $4,500.00 tuition for the Discipleship Training School and traveling money from California to the city of Saint John, New Brunswick, Canada, some 3,500 mile distance.
We embarked on our cross-country journey with our two small children, Josh and Jordan. Toni and I had only $300.00 cash and a gas and oil guzzling, 1973 Chevy station wagon. Needless to say, we were over $5,000.00 short. Yet, we truly believed that God would provide.
On our way to Canada, and after driving all night, the following morning, an 18-wheeler hit our car clocked by a Nevada State Trooper doing 90 miles per hour! The truck burst into flames on impact, skidding 600 feet before it exploded, catapulting debris 100 feet in the air! The impact to our Chevy station wagon thrusted us while inside our large vehicle, up the steep embankment, some thirty feet!
The truck driver jumped out safely, seconds before his rigg exploded! Later, the State Trooper told us that the truck driver had dosed off, which was why he collided into our car. Miraculously, none of us were seriously hurt, even though our Chevy station wagon was totaled. Our trip to Canada appeared to be cut short.
I put my family up in a Motel 6 in Elko Nevada, using part of the $300.00 we had started out with to cover the hotel expense. Yes, my wife and I were confused and dismayed, but soon experienced God’s peace over the crisis.
Within 24 hours of the accident, we received a knock on our hotel room door. It was an insurance adjuster, representing the trucking company responsible for the accident.
The adjuster wrote Toni and I a check for $25,000.00! At that time, it was more money than I had ever held or seen! Way more than enough for our YWAM tuition and traveling expenses!
Since our car was totaled, we took a bus ride to Salt Lake, Utah, to eventually catch a flight. While staying at another hotel, It was the next morning that God took me to a passage of Scripture:
“Therefore this is what the Sovereign LORD says: Since you have forgotten me and turned your back on me, you must bear the consequences…’ — Ezekiel 23:35
This verse popped up three times within 24 hours! It took me a while, but I began to understand what God was saying. Because we had received such a large sum of money that our faith and trust shifted, ever so slightly, from God to the money. In other words, we put our trust in the gift and not the Giver.
Later that morning, I lost my wallet with all the money in it! That Ezekiel verse kept echoing in my mind. Fortunately, I had kept part of the $25,000 settlement in the form of a certified check for $4,500.00, the rest in cash. But the certified check was also in my wallet!
You see, it is so easy and subtle to shift our trust and focus in God to other things. Because God loves us and that he’s a good and faithful Father, he won’t leave us in our sins. He corrects every son and daughter he loves.
Two weeks after we had arrived in Quebec, Canada, the Salt Lake Police Department in Utah sent me a letter, asking me to call or write back and describe the wallet’s contents. I want you to know that I didn’t have time to file a lost wallet report, and nothing in my wallet could’ve led the police to our temporary stop in Quebec. I still have this letter!
It was an absolute miracle that the Salt Lake Police Department found Toni and I while staying on a dairy farm in Quebec, Canada! I still, to this day, do not know how they found us!
Everything was still there in my wallet, except the $20,500.00 cash. Fortunately for us, the Canadian exchange rate in 1984 was 130%. Turning that certified check from $4,500.00 to $5,850.00! Because we had repented and adjusted our hearts, God gave us back just enough. As a matter of fact, because of God’s faithfulness, we were the only students who paid the required tuition in a lump sum!
When God calls us to obedience, he also provides the essentials. For us, his essentials came after each stage of obedience. The miracles were His way of rewarding our faith. Just like a father rewarding his son for doing a good job—God delights in our obedience!
I want you to know that when God calls a man, our response is critical. If we ignore His purpose for our lives, He sees this as rebellion—as stubbornness, which, God can be quick to show His displeasure. Just like He did for me, when I shifted my focus to money and away from Him.
Author and speaker John Eldredge has written that God wants you and me to become His “intimate ally.” He invites you and me to join Him in an adventure—a mission, if you will—a divine purpose that He uniquely planned for us. His mission is so critical for us that He planned it in every detail before He laid the foundations of the earth!
Dudes, did you just hear what I said?
Whether your name is John, Gary, David, or Steve, God thought of you, planned for you, and created a unique purpose for you outside of space, matter, and before time began! Let that sink in for just a moment—you matter so much to God, that you were, and are, in His thoughts, before He created the world and before you were even a twinkle in you parent’s hopes and dreams!
What will you do with this information? Don’t you want to connect with God’s mission for your life and His glory?
I can promise you this; when you do discover God’s divine purpose for your life, it will blow your mind so powerfully that your only response is to weep, tears of deep satisfaction and humility!
That’s what happened to me, I know God wants it to happen for you, too.
When I was twenty-one, my father-in-law, Gary Waltz, took me out to lunch to depart some fatherly wisdom into me, as I was about to become a father. One of the things he spoke to me didn’t make any sense at the time. He said, “Tom, you may never become a good speaker, but you will become a great writer.” By the way, I also became a public speaker!
Honestly, being a speaker or a writer wasn’t even on my radar. I was about to become a father, and that in itself was terrifying enough!
So, in 1981, my father-in-law spoke over my future, and in 2006, over twenty-five years later, it became true! Let’s take a look at a passage in Romans:
“As the Scriptures say, “I have made you a father of many nations.” This is true before God, the one Abraham believed—the God who gives life to the dead and speaks of things that don’t yet exist as if they are real.” Romans 4:17
God used my father-in-law to plant a seed of mission and purpose into my heart and soul. This mission was planned by God, our Creator, before He created our world!
So, back to the year 2006, around Spring time…
… I was about 46 years old when I had met a few people at a ministerial conference. I was there because my brother-in-law, Dwayne DeFount, known by most of you; he and I had started a men’s ministry titled Call To Courage. It was for that reason I was invited.
One of the individuals I had met was an editor of a bi-monthly publication titled America’s Good News, newspaper. We discussed nothing more than brief pleasantries and answered a few questions about our new men’s ministry.
A few days later, I received an unexpected call from a staff person from the newspaper. They invited me to become a columnist and to join the newspaper as a regular writer! I was shocked! I spoke to no one about writing, nor was it on my mind! I acted like I knew what all this meant. The staff-person explained what type and size font to use, how many words to include in each article, and the submission deadlines. Then the call ended.
As I hung up my phone, I placed my face into my hands and burst into tears! Tears, not of fear or sadness, but tears from an unexplored depth within my heart and soul! Those tears were of great humility and of purposeful fulfillment.
God had united His divine purpose and mission, for which He had planned before space, matter, and time existed, to be His writer! Now, do you see why it was so important for my father-in-law to plant God’s seed of mission and purpose into my life, so many years, prior? My father-in-law didn’t have a clue what and why he said that I was to become a writer, but God did.
Remember Romans 4:17?
“… Abraham believed—the God who gives life to the dead and speaks of things that don’t yet exist as if they are real.”
That is exactly what God did to me. He spoke those “things that were not yet, as if they are real!”
And this is why I’m here, speaking with you young men and even the older men here today. God has planned a mission or missions for you, too. I know this as I know the sun will rise in the East and settle in the West.
No man here today, in this place, at this moment and time is missionless or without divine purpose. As a matter of theological fact, you being here tonight was so ordered by God! This message was crafted, especially for you! You were and are in the mind and heart of God before He spoke the world into existence. In His timing, the seed He planted into the depths of your heart and soul is either being watered or harvested in you this night.
God longs for you to join Him in His adventurous mission for your life and for you to become His trusted and intimate ally. God trains the stouthearted during the journey. He looks for men, like you, who’ll not ask the faithless question about how? but will be brave enough to ask, when?
When God? I am willing. I know you are able. Prepare me as you have done with the men of Scripture. So that one day you will say to me, “… we’ll done my good and faithful servant.”
Oh, and remember to never trust the gift more than the Giver! Amen
“Be careful that no one fails to get God’s grace. Be careful that no one loses their faith and becomes like a bitter weed growing among you. Someone like that can ruin your whole group.” —Hebrews 12:15 (ERV)
A simple yet profound question from a friend has stayed with me:
“Tom, are you bitter or better?”
Life’s trials will come, but our choice determines our sense of peace. Bitterness isolates; betterness unites. By embracing God’s redemptive grace and forgiving others, we unlock a life of freedom, love, and meaningful relationships.
We are all confronted with hurt and pain from others. The choice to become bitter or better is available to all of us. The choice always comes down to two letters, the letter i or the e, b(i)tter or b(e)tter.
Bitterness is a collection of wrongs done by others, causing emotional constipation, psychological disfigurement, and spiritual disconnection from God and others.
The Holy Spirit wants to move us away from bitterness and leads us towards betterment. That is what God’s grace means here—the empowerment to avoid bitterness.
Matter of fact, the verse from Hebrews warns us to be careful that no one fails to receive God’s grace and that no one loses their faith. In other words, we need to watch each others back, rather than plunging knives into them.
Bitterness is the absence of God’s grace, as it displaces his presence, his wisdom, and conviction of the Holy Spirit. A bitter person is always looking to recruit people into their cesspool of bitter complaints. If you join them you’ll get drawn into their emotional quicksand with no one to rescue you!
We become bitter only when we reject God’s grace whispered to us by the Holy Spirit, and when we follow and listen to bitter people. Bitterness is a contagion; it is contracted through casual gossip and always corrupts the mind before it rots the soul. Bitterness has destroyed marriages, families, businesses, and especially churches.
Stay with God’s Word and his distinct and clear voice. Obey the Holy Spirit and become better. If not, you’ll destroy your faith, and walk away from God and the people who truly love you!
Even if you are bitter, you can become better. According to Hebrews 12:15, the antidote against bitterness is ensuring that not one person is missing out from God’s grace. Doing that leaves little time and opportunity for bitterness to take root.
When you stab yourself and others with bitterness, you also forfeit God’s grace that could be yours.
People will love a better you, but bitterness will drive even your closest friends away. Bitterness is a pill, whereby its side effect causes loneliness and detachment. Not only between those who love you, but even within yourself. Your bitterness makes you dangerous—a danger to yourself and others.
Bitterness grows within your heart and soul, like a destructive and evasive tree root. It enters into areas it doesn’t belong, causing emotional disfigurment, and psychological damage. But its damage is reversible. There is hope and healing!
Do you want to live a better life?
Then forgive the offense of others, and you’ll live a bitter free life.
I know—I know, you’ve been terribly hurt or offended. But your bitterness puts you in competition with God. You’re actually saying, “I know better than God,” and therefore you feel justified to condemn. That’s pretty tragic, don’t you think?
But the longer you hold onto bitterness, the more impossible it is for you to forgive. The longer you wait to forgive those who’ve hurt you the further away God’s grace becomes.
I don’t want you to miss out on God’s grace, I want you free and full of life, just like you used to be. I want you to find your faith again in God and to enjoy his presence in your soul.
I want you to love and to be loved again. I want you to stop the cruelty to your heart and soul!
Don’t you see?
Bitterness is not the cure—it’s a poison! The real cure may seem impossible, but it’s the only cure that will set you free and put you on the road to recovery.
The only cure to bitterness is forgiveness. Forgiveness is even more powerful if you were to lead in it. I promise that if you do, you’ll be right as rain and feeling better and not bitter.
Call To Courage 